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I once read something that pointed out that we will never see ourselves.  We can see our reflection in a mirror or photos of ourselves.  But that's it.

I was working on a mini-project while I was home this past weekend and my sister was helping me with camera stuff.  When I was looking through the photos that night, I said to my mom, "Look at my hair!  It's out of control."  My sister had a confused look on her face and said, "I like your hair..."  I looked from my mom to my sister, and back again and said, "You mean it always looks like this?"

I had no idea it was that wavy.  I spent my high school years straightening it every morning, just like everyone else in 2009.  It wasn't until I started life guarding and letting it air dry in the sun and going straight from work to dinner dates that I stopped using so much heat.  And I can always see my hair from the front, but I had never noticed how crazy-wavy it was in the back.  I'd never seen the way it moved until we started doing this video project.

We will never see the way our hair changes color in the sun or the way our eyes light up when we tell a story.  We will never see the way we look at the people we love and we will never see ourselves experience an adventure for the first time.

We can watch videos of ourselves, but the camera will never be able to capture the way that our freckles stand out when we're angry or the way we breathe when we're thinking deeply.  We can watch ourselves smile in the mirror, but even then it's a mirror image.  Flipped.  Reversed.

We know how we're feeling and we know what we're thinking, but we won't ever see the way we express it.  In fact, we might be the last people in the world to know.

And to think that we think we know ourselves better than anyone else.

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